Sunday, July 13, 2008

Hot and Bothered




Obviously the heat's not a problem as it's been soggy, grey and damp for days now, although the sun's shining today, hurrah! Lurch urgently put his apron on, rushed into the garden and is beavering away chopping up guinea fowl ready to put on the barbecue or 'braii' as he refers to it.

Lurch loves a braii, he won't have a gas one and he performs a special ritual whenever he lights it (ie. as often as he can). He cleans it out thoroughly, by hand, and then painstakingly assembles a mini-mountain of coals, by hand again, pours tons of lighter fluid over it to make sure that whatever meat he cooks will have an evenly distributed marinade, or 'taint' as I prefer to call it. The next stage is spending about forty minutes frantically fanning it with a dustpan, he always leaves the back door open so that smoke wafts into the house, curling into every corner. Then, once he's satisfied that it's 'going like a train' (same expression, every time), he comes inside and, with a surgeon's precision, washes his hands, leaving coal dust around the sink, on the soap and up the wall and indelible marks on the towel as he dries his hands, I'm looking for some black ones, actually. He says he is 'born to braii'.



I find this time of year very tiring, lots of rushing around, finishing things off, celebrating the end of things and preparing for next term's things.

We've had two school letters about Danny Boy this week. The first was from the government's young, gifted and talented resource asking him to join. We asked him what he was gifted and talented in and he didn't know but took it as an affront and went off to sulk in his room. I phoned the school and the Head of Year asked me if I'd received her letter about DB underachieving. No, I hadn't, so she explained that he was going to be monitored to make him focus and put him on target to achieve what he should be achieving. He is apparently gifted and talented in Science, Geography, History and, to everybody's amazement, Religious Education. I took the opportunity to complain about his english teacher and we'll see what happens next year. I appreciate the fact that the school is trying to do the best for him but he is a terminal daydreamer, I have to say. Good luck to them!

The Terminator's report referred to 'blips in behaviour' but congratulated him on 'beginning to walk away from trouble' so maybe there is some light at the end of that long dark tunnel. I was rather anxious, though, about his 'amusing tales of home'. I can imagine.

I've also spoken to Wendy who had her first chemo session last week and was violently sick for four days. Her ice cap didn't work either so she's had to go and order a wig. She's not allowed to cook in it because it's nylon and heat shrinks it! She was struggling to find a silver lining, so I cheered her up with chat about my £1,000 bill for the car and possible lunch time suspensions for The Terminator if he keeps fighting at school, along with arguing with Lurch about whether or not we should be going to Zambia for three weeks. She felt much better by the end of our chat, she said.

So, term is ending in a few days and the end is in sight, thank goodness...



We're going on a mini-break, just the boys and I with my school friend and her two daughters. We're going camping to the Isle of Wight. I'm really looking forward to chilling, chatting, catching up, drinking wine by candlelight and exploring a new place. Fantastic!



Then the boys are going to stay with El Vel and Sean, Sean the Leprechaun for a week. They've been instructed to pack tennis racquets and golf clubs as V&S are the Veteran King and Queen of the golf club. They will love it, The Terminator will have to eat all of his vegetables, home-grown by Sean, and Danny Boy will have to tidy his room and make his bed every day as El Vel takes no prisoners on the domestic front. Roll on the summer holidays!

11 comments:

Lindsay said...

Men do like a good fire don't they! Husband BBQ's the boy scouts way only using wood and a match to start the action. I get worried as the open garage door is nearby and I think it will be added to the BBQ or accidentally catch light. Enjoy IOW.

goodbyetoallfat said...

I used to love holidays on the Isle of Wight when I was a child. Me and my younger brother had a mad part Irish Granny who used to deliberately pronounce everything wrong -- she always told is it was the:

Izzel de Widget

(pronounced just like that!)

rosiero said...

It always amuses me that men like to cook on a barbie outside but ask them to cook on a stove inside and it becomes too difficult!!

Tara@From Dawn Till Rusk said...

Hope you have a great break. Our fondest holiday memories are when we've been camping - funnily enough we just gloss over the rowing about why it should take so long to get our tent up or whose turn it is to fetch the water.

Suburbia said...

I sooo understand your BBQing husband! Mine is the same, with a slight difference, he uses a frisby to fan the fire rather than a dustpan! It's the caveman in them I guess!!

Exmoorjane said...

How funny, my niece was supposedly gifted in RE too - much to everyone's amazement. Do you reckon it's a conspiracy by RE teachers to up the ante on their subject?
Glad you were able to cheer Wendy up - eek to not being able to cook in a wig. IoW sounds great too.....
jx

blogthatmama said...

Lindsay, Rosiero and Suburbia I can't believe how much fuss Lurch makes with his bbq, drives me insane, he's actually a much better cook than me, so we could drop the drama!

Sharon, I'll think of that when I'm there, that's lovely!

Tara we love camping too, something very free and easy about it, I think..

Jane, I think they've got DB mixed up with Alice again or put names in a hat cos they didn't know who anybody was. Wendy and I couldn't help but laugh about the heat shrinking wig!

Casdok said...

Ohh i love the Isle of Weight! Hope the weather is good to you, sounds like you all deserve it!

A Confused Take That Fan said...

Have a lovely mini break. Sounds great esp drinking wine by candle light. Room for one more?

goodbyetoallfat said...

I'm so delighted that DB and TT have taken a liking to one of my late Granny's mad sayings!!!

Fat, frumpy and fifty... said...

when are you going to IOW..l'm going 6-9 august....though you are very brave to camp..my family love it..but l cant get down and dirty (?*!!) l dont think that came out the way l meant it, in fact l know it didnt...aw well...
might bump into you..