Friday, November 21, 2008

My new career, stalker or eduwarrior?





So which is it to be? Last week I fell into the slough of despond or the trough of disillusionment, whatever... The reason for this despair is that I examined Danny Boy's school books. He has had several assessments in the last couple of weeks and appears to have gone backwards in every single subject. In History he has gone from a level 7 to a level 3 and, at the age of nearly 13, has spent about six weeks colouring in pictures of Henry VIII, devoting himself to shading yellow and green syphilitic ulcers on Henry's legs. WTF? His English book hasn't been marked by his teacher since the term began although he has, once again, designed a chocolate bar for the rest of the class to mark. Having been involved in Marketing and New Brand Development for 20 years I feel well placed to judge whether Shakespeare or I will leave the greater legacy to this country. So, I've decided that my new career is going to involve either stalking Ed Balls or stirring the masses to rebel against the dumbing down of education. I am on a mission.



The cavalry arrived on Tuesday, just in time for The Terminator's birthday. When I came home from work I could make out a dim halo of light shining on the driveway, yes it was Sean Sean the Leprechaun with a camping headlamp strapped to his forehead, finishing off The Guardian Sudoko in the car. El Vel was at his side, rubber gloves poking out of the suitcase, ready for action. As usual, to the utter bewilderment of Lurch, they brought their own towels and mugs as well as all of the half-finished food in their fridge. After five trips between the car and the house we managed to squeeze it all in.



I showed her DB's books and, as a former Deputy Head, she was appalled. I made a list of issues and phoned the Head of Year. She responded fantastically and is interviewing the Subject Heads and then Danny Boy, she and I will be meeting. Hope is glimmering, Danny Boy is scowling, I am crusading. The fridge is sparkling, the vegetable patch has been dug over and planted with purple sprouting broccoli and cabbages, and as I waved goodbye to my parents I felt that all was now right with the world. And relax...

17 comments:

Suburbia said...

They bring their own mugs??!! And I thought mine were odd ;)

Hope the school probs sort themselves out, I can't believe his book hasn't been marked for so long!

DJ Kirkby said...

Wow...I feel in need of some therapy after my mom has been for an extended visit! What is going on in that school your sons? Anyway, after you've sorted his school out could you come down our way and work your magic on N3S's school please?

Lindsay said...

My son, now 40, would not work at school. He was outstanding at sport and was in all the teams. I suggested that he was dropped from the teams until his work improved. "No" the school said - we need him in the teams! He did not go to uni and did not have a gap year but blossomed as soon as he had a job and is now earning a fortune in London. So I hope your son is just as successful in the end.

Working mum said...

Just off to check that I'm up to date with all my marking...........

(Of course I am, how could his book not be marked within the space of a week, let alone a term? - you are right to question it)

KittyB said...

Go forth and ask questions - Level 7 to Level 3 is inexplicable. Find out why!

Lori ann said...

Have you thought of home school Mama? If its at all possible, sounds as if you are more than qualified for the job!
xx

Grit said...

surely the class started winding down and preparing for christmas immediately after half term? that could explain it.

Stinking Billy said...

mama, super duper, you whack it to 'em, girl!

cheshire wife said...

He has designed a chocolate bar. You may have the next Andy Warhol.

Mud in the City said...

Wow - you're on a mission! Good luck! So much better than hiding your head in the sand and hoping it will all get better.

Expat mum said...

Good for you. They are probably thrilled to have a parent this keen! If you can go in there with a "team" effort appraoch rather than ready for war, you'll win them over and they'll agree to everything you request!

blogthatmama said...

Suburbia you wouldn't believe what they bring!

DJ Kirkby I've got a long way to go, I'm afraid but Lindsay you're giving me hope.

Working Mum glad of your professional advice and Kitty B I just don't understand what's going on.

Lori I don't think Danny Boy would want me teaching him, I think we'd be arguing non-stop!

You could be right there Grit, don't even know if he's in a Nativity Play though and Billy I've got the bit between my teeth now.

CH I'm afraid I don't think so, although art and design isn't my strong subject.

Mud and EM I've been worried since he went to the school, he's only got one chance and this is it, I had to do something, not that I particularly enjoy discussions like that...

A Confused Take That Fan said...

Well done for doing something and taking a stand. And having a sparkly fridge, a neat vegetable patch and coping with visitors who bring their own mugs and half the content of their fridge (sounds like my father and stepmother).
Let us know how you get on with the school...

blogthatmama said...

ACTTF, I'm afraid El Vel made the fridge sparkly and Sean Sean the Leprechaun did the veg patch, I'm rubbish at household maintenance, too busy on the computer!

Casdok said...

You cant beat a crusading mum! Hope you get it sorted and are able to relax!

an ordinary Saffa girl said...

You are a mum on a mission!!! Lovely blog!

Mae said...

We need more mums like you. You go get them.